Earlier this month I told the miraculous tale of the return of my cat Lucia. Not only did she come back safe and whole but she seemed to have grown a backbone. She spent more time roaming the house and less hours hiding from the dog on the shelf over our refrigerator. She didn’t even mind the new cat. Well, she did give one token hiss in passing, as if to say, “The Queen has returned. Off with your head!” We had gotten used to the idea of being a 3 cat family. Then, exactly a week after Lucia came home, we woke up to find her lethargic and clearly sick.
Ironically Tatiana, the new cat (my birthday gift) had a bad kitty cold. But after trips to the vet for both of them it became clear that they had completely different things. While Tatiana bounced back Lucia got sicker and sicker, to the point where I had to feed her pureed, watered-down baby-food-like cat food through a baby medicine dropper. Half the time she gagged on it.
On Friday we made the heartbreaking decision to have her put to sleep. The vet decided that she must have developed pneumonia, possibly while she was on the road. Or she could have caught Tatiana’s cold and, being much older, couldn’t fight it off. As I waited for the vet to come in and give the injection I wondered for the hundredth time why God would send my precious cat back to me only to have her die. The only thought that comforted me was, as least she died with me instead of alone in a bush somewhere. At least I got to hold her and stroke her and tell her what a good kitty she was while she slipped away on my lap. Still it didn’t seem fair.
This happened at a time when so much doesn’t seem fair in life. I won’t pour out all the drama. Let’s just say that losing Lucia was just one more hard thing. This morning I read a passage from the book of Job (yeah, I know, what a nice pick me up when you’re already down). God had just responded to Job questioning by basically asking, “Um, are you God? Did you create the world?” Humbled Job responded, “I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted” (Job 42:2).
I closed my Bible with the sense that God knows what He is doing even if none of it seemed fair or logical to me. I still miss Lucia. I still wish many things were different. But God still cares and has a plan even if I can’t see even a tiny bit of it.
Maybe there is something in your life that seems unfair. Ask God to help you cling to His love and purpose today.