Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Good Friends--Having Them and Finding Them

Camy here talking about friends.

I didn’t have any best friends all through middle school and high school. I had good friends, but they didn’t have that much in common with me.

Looking back, I realize that it’s okay when your friends don’t have everything in common with you, because even your best friend doesn’t have everything in common with you, but back then, I thought I needed to collect around me friends who were completely likeminded. I realize now that that’s unrealistic, and it’s also a disservice to my own personal development. I needed people around me who were different from me.

I found some good friends in college, too, and God drew people to me who could help me become a woman who would serve Him and please Him.

But I didn’t find my best friends until I started writing and discovered that writing was what I was really called to do. And then I found other writers with whom I could talk to about writing.

All that to say, it took me a LONG time to find my best friends, and during that time, I was impatient and expecting my good friends to fill every relational need I had. Even my best friends don’t do that, yet I was expecting my good friends to do that.

The reality is that God fulfills my every need, and it took me a long time to get to that point where I had surrendered myself completely to Him and depended on Him completely. Jesus is my Best Friend, and He fills me in ways that no one else in my life will.

My good friends and my best friends add color and enjoyment to my life, but more importantly, they point me to God. I don’t NEED them in my life, but God uses them to add love to my life.

How about you? Are you like me, struggling with finding friends? Or do you already have friends who circle around you?

Camy Tang writes romance with a kick of wasabi. Out now is her humorous contemporary romance novel, Single Sashimi, and her romantic suspense, Formula for Danger. In her spare time, she is a staff worker for her church youth group, and she leads one of the worship teams for Sunday service. On her blog, she ponders dogs, knitting and spinning wool, running, Asiana, and other frivolous things. Sign up for her newsletter for giveways!

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Camy Tang said...

Tell me about your struggles or about your friends!

girls room said...

Thanks for great index of very useful resources in a single page.

Jessica Medrzycki said...

As I'm getting older (only 13) I am realizing more and more how little good friends I have, just like you said in the post. I love this site! It really helps me be okay with myself and trusting in God for a lot of things.

You guys inspire me to blog myself!

Camy Tang said...

Girls room, you're welcome!

Jessica, you should go for it! Blogging is fun!

sarah said...

I wish I could tell you about my friends, but i have none. mostly because of my leukemia i think, cause as soon as i told them, they started to hang out with other people.

Camy Tang said...

Sarah, if your leukemia is the reason, then they're not worth you being friends with. As your first priority, you should pray for God to work in your life to mold you into someone more like Himself, and then as your second priority, for Him to bring friends into your life. Friends are good, but Jesus should be your number one friend.