Journey back from suicide!

I am so excited to announce that Life, In Spite of Me: Extraordinary Hope After A Fatal Choice. This is the story of my friend Kristen Anderson.

After her fatal choice… extraordinary hope.

Kristen Anderson thought she had the picture perfect life until strokes of gray dimmed her outlook on life. Once a happy child, Kristen’s world darkened after three friends and her grandmother died within two years. Still reeling from these losses, she was raped by a friend she thought she could trust. She soon spiraled into a depression that didn't seem to have a bottom.

One January night, the seventeen-year-old made a decision: She no longer wanted to deal with the emotional pain that smothered her. She lay down on a set of cold railroad tracks and waited—for a freight train to send her to heaven…and peace.

Amazingly, Kristen survived her suicide attempt… but the 33 freight cars that ran over her severed her legs. Now she not only had to deal with depression; she also had to face the physical pain and life without legs.

But Kristen's story didn't end there. After her darkest days Kristen discovered a real purpose for living. Now, in her compelling book Life, In Spite of Me, Kristen shares her journey from despair to hope.

Includes letters from Kristen that share messages she wishes someone would have told her—when she was depressed and struggling with loss, shame from sexual abuse, and suicidal thoughts. Watch the video trailer here!

The blog tour will begin May 17th - check back for schedule and go here between the 17th and 31st for a chance to win a copy of this amazing book!

A Season for Hope

I didn't stuff myself this year for Thanksgiving, but I made a ton of stuffing. My husband and I enjoyed the day with our family and about 95 others. We live and work at a residential ministry for at-risk youth. Thanksgiving is a big deal around here . . . as is Christmas.

Fun, exciting . . . and also, for some, extremely difficult.

I'm guessing that in similar ways that's true for many children and teens all over the world. Some do all they can to scrape together bits of hope and joy to get through their holidays. It's not easy to smile when surrounded by or feeling brokenness and pain.

As I enter the Christmas season, I've been wondering if I could, in some small way, bring about the beginnings of a smile or some hope. The joy of a baby in a manger and knowlege of this one who now invites relationship with him? Glimpses of possibilities for a new turn in their life story? Yes, I think so. Others once did that for me.

I am challenged to ask God to help me be especially aware of at least one teen who needs that experience of hope. I can invite her to join us for one of our holiday celebrations. Show her love. Show her Christ.

Will you join me in that challenge?

To share: If you have done this during past Christmases or someone has encouraged you in this way, tell us about your experience. Plan to do something like that this year? Share your ideas.

Enjoy this season of celebrating the gift of Christ. Immanuel--God with us!

"The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel"--which means, "God with us"
(Matthew 1:23 NIV).

Jan
author of the Live Free series, Standard Publishing

true stories, true hope

for teens, young adults,
and those who care about them.

Chat

It was my first Webchat. Writing fast and furious, I fielded questions about writing the true stories of the Live Free series, about teen issues, and about my own story. At times my thoughts flew faster than my fingers. I valued the opportunity, the questions giving me glimpses of what others are thinking about and wrestling with. Hopefully, prayerfully, what I shared will encourage a few. (If you'd like, read the chat at Abunga—scroll to September 10th.)

I thought about it later. It would have been amazing to sit down and chat in person, for all to talk and share what God has been showing us about these topics, to pray together. I’m guessing some that joined—whether silently listening or participating with their questions—might have longed for some human contact, eye-to-eye knowing that people care; perhaps some honest on-our-faces prayer and gathering of hope that God really is here listening, weeping for those who are scraping the bottom for a bit of healing or direction.

He is here, listening, inviting relationship.

Challenge for this week for me . . . perhaps for you too: Ask God to help me see someone who needs the hope he gives. Sit with them. I don’t necessarily have to say much. I can pray.

I can pray for you too. Feel free to e-mail me through my site, http://www.jankern.com/

Jan
author of the Live Free series, Standard Publishing

true stories, true hope

for teens, young adults,
and those who care about them.

Quote Challenges

I love quotes. Last night at a friend’s graduation I was inspired by a few I’ve heard before, but the context of the ceremony and the students’ speeches revived their challenges for me. Here are some:

“I haven’t failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that don’t work.”

—Thomas Edison (who tried 10,000 alloys before discovering the filament that would work for his electric bulb)

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

—Seneca, Roman Philospher, 1st Century AD

"The greater danger for most of us lies in not setting our aim high and falling short, but in setting our aim too low and achieving our mark."

—Michelangelo

All of these quotes challenge me to push forward, dig deeper, and aim higher; to enjoy the process of determined attempts even when I have to start over; to see the hope in changes even when good things seem to have come to an end; to strive for goals that are, no doubt, out of reach even when I could fall short.

Just wondering. In the above quotes, do you happen to see some scriptural parallels in stories or verses you’ve read recently? Up for sharing them here? And please also feel free to share some of your favorite quotes and what they inspire for you.

Jan

New release:

Eyes Online, Eyes On Life—A Journey Out of Online Addictions

(A story of a Colin’s journey of courage and others like him—guys and girls—who've discovered a way out their traps of compulsive Internet use.)

www.jankern.com

Self-Injury—Raising Awareness

Last week I read an article that said that 1 in 6 teens are involved in self-harming behavior. Anytime I read a statistic, on self-injury or anything to do with teens who are hurting and broken, I want to ask, “How many never give their voice to those numbers?”

An article from July, 2007 gave another perspective. 633 students from five high schools, average age 16, anonymously participated in a survey. 46% admitted they had been involved in some form of self-injury within the prior year. 60% of those described their self-injury as moderate to severe.

If those numbers are anywhere closer to representative, then the numbers are much higher than 1 in 6 teens.

March 1st is National Self-Injury Awareness Day. Do you know the signs that someone may be self-harming? Do you know how to begin to help? It’s okay if you don’t, and it's not something you should feel you have to do alone. Here are some ways to raise your awareness or help others do so:

Visit my site where I’m blogging about this topic, including how teens help teens. Also, click on “self-injury resources” in the side column for links and resource suggestions.

Consider reading Jackie’s true story in Scars That Wound, Scars That Heal—A Journey Out of Self-Injury. Not only will this book help you understand self-injury and how to help, it’s a book that can be given to any teen or young adult who may be struggling. It is written for them.

(Read an excerpt.)

I interviewed both guys and girls for that book. Suzy was one of those who shared her story. At one point she told me, “Though I had been cutting, really the main way I was self-harming was through my promiscuous lifestyle.” I told Suzy’s story in the second of the Live Free series. Hers is an amazing love story. Seduced by Sex, Saved by Love—A Journey Out of False Intimacy will release March 3rd (available to preorder).

Jackie, Suzy, and others have shared their stories. Their voices mattered. Remember, real stories are behind the statistics you read about. Some of those could belong to people you know. It could be yours.

There is help and there is hope for healing. Feel free to contact me through my website if you need more information.

(The LORD) heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds . . . Great is our Lord and abundant in strength. His understanding is infinite. Psalm 147:3,5 NAS

On my knees for you.

Jan

http://choose2livefree.com/
http://www.jankern.com/

Mukti--God Knows Her by Name

My daughter, Sarah, and two others from her college traveled to India this summer. They spent a month in Calcutta—Kolkata, officially. The purpose of their trip, and their passion, was the young women (many are teens!) who are trying to escape a life of prostitution—very often a trade they would never have chosen. Two organizations in this city of five million captured the hearts of my daughter and her friends. Both teach the women a new trade and both share the transforming hope of a relationship with Jesus. At Freeset the women design and create canvas bags, and at Sari Bari they make quilts out of old saris (Indian clothing).

I was able to take in small glimpses of the culture through my daughter’s stories and those of her teammates. Sometimes I caught Sarah online for a quick chat, but most of the time I simply read and wept over some of things they shared in their blog, Calcutta Love!

When my daughter returned, she gave me a quilt that one of the young women had sewn. In one corner, it has a small label which reads, “made in India by Mukti.” Mukti is a beginning level of apprenticeship in making the quilts. Sarah told me that if a woman stays through this time of apprenticeship, there’s a much better chance she won’t return to prostitution. She also said that when each woman succeeds in her apprenticeship, she can begin to attach a label with her personal name to her quilts. That must mean so much to them.

As I hold my quilt and run my fingers along the rows of stitches, I think of the woman who pushed a needle through the four layers of fabric—a Mukti, a person with a name, and a story I can't even begin to imagine. I pray for her. I hope she completes her apprenticeship, and with each stitch she sews, each quilt she completes, that she is one firm step closer to a new life filled with hope.

I haven't experienced anything like this young woman, but I know, just like her, I have a name and a story that God knows well. He knows when I mess up. He has rescued me when I've found myself backed into a corner I can't get out of on my own. He daily gives me hope and helps me walk closer and closer toward him.

Here is something God said to the Israelites as a nation. I believe he says it just as passionately and personally to us today:

Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine! When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, Nor will the flame burn you. (Isaiah 43:1-2 NAS)

What an amazing God. And he knows and loves each of us!

Jan
www.choose2livefree.com

Yeah, YOU ... that's who I'm talking about!

Tricia Goyer here.

You know what I've been thinking about? I've been thinking about YOU.

1. You matter. You are significant, not because of what you do, but because of who you are.

2. You are wonderful. When you see yourself as God sees you, you don’t have to worry about an identity crisis. You are his child. You have amazing strengths that are unique to you.

3. You can succeed. When you take time to explore your dreams and dare to grow by trusting God to help you, you become more of the person he designed you to be. You also become a gift to those around you!

4. You are loved. Intimacy means connecting with someone who touches your heart—through communication, time spent together, and love shared. True intimacy is found when you connect with those who appreciate you for YOU. They are concerned about you and honor you in every way.

5. You are smart. We receive instruction from school, through special training, and from life. Focus on being instructed by those who want you to succeed and are willing to help you.

6. You can’t do it alone. Everyone needs a support system--friends, parents, teachers, and mentors. Also, if we ask for his help, God never makes us struggle alone. His help may be bringing another person into our life. It may be giving us the courage to deal with our bad habits or to get out of a destructive relationship. His help may be providing the strength to go to attend school, to work, and take care of yourself. Jesus is available 24/7. Just ask.

7. You need to recharge. We can’t work 100% of the time. Everyone needs to enjoy life and rest. When God created the world, he worked for six days, then rested on the seventh. He didn’t need to take that long. He didn’t need a day off. He did it as an example for us. God created within us the need to balance our work with rest. This includes a physical breather—actually setting aside time for recreation. We don’t need to feel guilty for the way we were made. Taking time to have fun is just as important as taking time to meet our other needs!

8. You can’t do it all. Perspective means focusing on what will last—especially our family, other relationships, and God. They are the things we will never regret giving our time, energy, and love to. Focus on those.

9. You matter. Everyone needs to feel that what they do is important. If you ever doubt if you are important ... just look into the face of your child. No one can take your place!