What I Prayed for, but Not

“It looks like I found a roommate, and I think we also found an apartment.”

My son’s news was an answer to prayer. Since my youngest son and I moved and my oldest decided to stay behind where his job is, he has needed a new living situation. I have been extremely concerned that he would suddenly need to leave his temporary home and find himself with no place to go. He has been living alone, which clearly wasn’t healthy for him. The more time that ticked away without any leads on a roommate, the more I thought God might be giving me the true desire of my heart—that he would decide he was tired of being so far away from his mom and little brother and join us where we are, near his grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Instead, he found a roommate at the eleventh hour. And an apartment. And he was clearly excited about it. 

“That’s great.”

We chatted about the furniture that was available for him if he wanted it, moving dates, and financial details, and the whole time my heart cried out, “God, this isn’t what I wanted. I thought you would send him here.”

But somehow I knew this was His answer, at least for now. At my son’s age I was already married. Most of his friends now live away from home. Joining us would mean leaving a job he loves and all his friends. Maybe he will get lonely for his family later, but for now I need to support his decision and be happy for him, which I am. At least he won’t be living alone under a ticking clock anymore. I have been praying that God would work in his life in a big way and so have many others, so living with friends must be part of that. Who knows what plan God has in mind?

When I chose to move in November, I know my friends wanted me to stay, but they supported my need to be close to family, helped me pack, gave me a going away party, and smothered me with hugs until my youngest and I pulled out of town. Now it’s my turn to do the same, because that’s what we do when we truly want God’s best for those we care about. As painful as it is, sometimes we need to recognize that we are getting what we prayed for even if it doesn’t look that way.

When have you prayed hard for someone only to be forced to let go of them? When have you seen a supposed “wrong” answer to prayer become the right one?  

 

Put Me In the Zoo

Every couple months, my 2 1/2 year old daughter falls in love with Robert Lopshire's Put Me in the Zoo. She'll want to read it over and over. Before naptime. Before bedtime. And any time in-between. Until finally either me or my husband snap and we hide the book.

But despite the fact that at the moment I have zero desire to touch Put Me in the Zoo, I can still appreciate how subtle the message is. Most kids stuff these days beats you over the head with its message - be a good friend, don't hit, share your toys, etc. But a classic like Put Me in the Zoo isn't nearly as message-oriented, and as an adult, I sure appreciate it.

The, er, creature in the book (Seriously, what is that thing? I asked my daughter, and she told me a dog.) wants to live in the zoo. The zookeepers proclaim that he's unwanted, and they toss him out. A boy and girl follow, and ask why he thinks he should be in the zoo. The creature then proceeds to entertain them with all the things he can do with his spots. He can make them different colors, he can juggle them, he can make them various sizes, he can put them on all kinds of things, and so on. With everything that he can do, the dog-like creature is confused about why the zoo doesn't recognize his value and put him in the zoo!

Then the little boy points out that the zoo isn't really the best place for him - the circus actually better fits his skills.

The book closes with an illustration of the creature looking very happy in front of an audience, stating, "Yes! This is where I want to be. The circus is the place for me!"

How often am I so focused on where I want to be, where I want to go, where I think I belong, that I completely miss out on something that would be even better? That would bring me more satisfaction? That would fit my abilities in a more complete way?

I guess it's good my daughter wants to read the book so many times, because this is a lesson I'm constantly relearning. Closed doors are often an invitation to let go of my sub par dreams and embrace the richness of God's plans for me.

Growing up--Letting Go

Maybe some of our teenage readers feel like your moms cling too much. Won't give you your space. Want to talk all the time.

Maybe some of our mom readers are struggling with letting our grown or almost grown children go. I was.

It's hard.

I wrote about letting my son Thomas go. He's eighteen. For me, letting go has been a process. He's my youngest child. My baby. His sisters are in their twenties. We lost a baby boy before Thomas was born. Maybe this has something to do with why I had a hard time letting him go. I don't know. He broke his leg on his seventeenth birthday at football practice. Of course, I tried to baby him. That didn't work.

You can read about us in the November issue of Guideposts or find it on their Web site at www.guideposts.com. The title of my story is "A Change of Season." Sign up on their site to read it.

Can anybody identify?

One good thing. Thomas is pleased with the story I wrote. He showed his friends. :-)

Love,
Julie